Why completing things changes us… and what happens when we don’t…

It always seems impossible until it’s done’ Nelson Mandela
A teacher of mine recently said ‘completing things changes us’. I have been musing on this since and it resonates strong…
I haven’t always been a completer… before alchemy, I struggled to finish things. As tension set in, I would become overwhelmed, start doubting myself, get distracted or enticed by a ‘newer, better’ idea… and that cycle would continue, with me on an emotional wave of excitement and dread at each new project (but never being able to get anything finished)… Over the past 7 years of studying alchemy, I have been getting better at better at learning to hold all of that tension and concretise the magic…

Last week Ella Mesma Company completed on a 7 day takeover at The Place with the BA1, and it did change me: in fact it felt like it changed all of us involved a little bit…


Here is why: Team Jelly consisted of David Evans (whom I have been working with ever since he attended an audition for the company back in 2017), Francesca Matthys, whom I was aware of since 2019 as a wonderful human, Diana (whom I met whilst work at the Afro-Latin fest in Johannesburg in 2019) suggested we connect, but it was my first time working with (the first of many!) and Ama Rouge (with whom I also celebrated 21 years of friendship this week!) and we really were a power team… in the mornings, before we met with students we had our own check in, the same in the evenings after the sessions… each time reflecting, learning and refocusing our intention… we had a beautiful plethora of overlapping skills, and also were all able to take responsibility for areas were we were less skilled and share the load… and by the end of the project, I really understood how this unique combination of skills & time & reflection & getting practiced at holding tension meant that we really did made magic! I had so many beautiful messages from the students sharing how the project had changed them.

I was invited in to work with the BA1s (The Bloom Collective) for Enrichment week after the beautiful project, ‘Welcome to Our House’ which I created with Akeim Toussaint, because I had put wellbeing at the forefront of the project, and so I vowed to do that again…

Always it starts with wellbeing (because how you gonna win if you ain’t right within, Lauryn Hill), and then just so much magic on top from Kizomba, to company rep to collages, to filming and adding to our online world Utopia to Object animation to Fashion shows to yoga, to Voice work, to the jellyfish metaphor and Genius Loci work (thank you Piny Orchidaceae) my heart is so FULL and I am so inspired by the unique talent of each and every student (all 72 of them!) Go team Jelly!

Thank you so much to the beautiful team! Thank you so much to the beautiful cast/company/collective! Thank you to the costume department Emma Lyth & family who helped  create a beautiful Jellyfish fashion show! Thank you to all the staff at The Place who helped with glue & pens for collages. Thank you Team Jelly for the magic we made! And most of all to each beautiful individual of the Bloom Collective who moved me to tears with your art from the heart! You are all so creative, beautiful and shiny! ❤️ 🪼 🌟
I experienced that sense of completion and being changed again holding the tension of moving sets over the weekend: I collected a van in Leeds, drove it to Bradford, collected a set, drove it back to Leeds (to the wonderful Open Source Arts where I am a resident artist), then after unloading, I collected the rig for our next Rainbow Butterfly show (in Bicester for The Mill Arts Centre on the 16th & 17th February featuring Ama Rouge and myself. Sign up HERE) and drove that set to Bristol. The whole journey took me 7 hours in total (not including dropping off the van the next day!) and I spent a good part of that nervous and in tension… but I did it! And despite the resistance, I learnt that I am a good driver, and it also gave me many hours to reflect on life and realise how much I have to be grateful for over the past 7 years of transformation… and again… arriving in Bristol I was changed… that task that my identity told me was impossible and I couldn’t possibly… I DID IT!!!! 🙂


What about you? What have you been creating/completing? Did it leave you feeling changed?
Or if you are someone who struggles with completing things, let’s talk because helping people with this is my new superpower (I am a navel chakra yellow lioness powerhouse) and in ways where wellbeing is still at the HEART always. Find out which of your chakras are in or out of balance HERE!)

In other news, it’s about to be my birthday and here is how you can get involved in the celebrations:ang ou

Come hang out in Utopia for a Grand Tour and party: our beautiful online world created by the wonderful Bryan Aldea with illustrations by Jessica Rosas and the imagination of Ella Mesma plus some amazing additions by BA1 students at The Place.

For The Goddxx Path family, I am holding a FREE Land of Plenty (the place where all our hearts’ desires are waiting to be realised) vision boarding session the day before my birthday: if you haven’t already RSVP send me a message for the zoom link. And those interested in joining The Goddxx Path for 2024, you can sign up for a FREE interview HERE

Facebook gave me an early birthday this year (it announced my birthday to the world on the 9th when my birthday falls on the 23rd January, but as a result, I have one of those wee Facebook fundraisers HERE

And then the rest of the week, I will be celebrating with my new lovely partner, playing the I want game (which I teach in my Embodied Alchemy and SACRED Bowl courses), walking in nature and having the final piece of my Vedic astrology reading with the amazing Rita Diamond! Wahoooo!

Oh plus training ready for a show next month!