The mini revolution that caused huge changes within my inner universe…

I am loving the synchronicities between my dance-work, personal life and The Goddxx Path journey. Currently, we are in HEART on The Goddxx Path (and Embodied Alchemy), whilst I am working on a piece called Okan (meaning One-Hearted in Yoruba) exploring healthy relationships, whilst also journeying relating in a whole new mature way.

And today I want to talk HEART in relation to wellbeing and HOMEostasis… ❤️ 

This is inspired by the fact that two weeks ago now (wow that long ago already!), I took part in the ODI intensive a space curated by Piny Orchidacae… I didn’t know what would unfold, or even exactly what the intensive was, but intuitively, I knew it was true for me to attend… and it proved to be valuable in so many ways. The most recent realisation landed during the next two weeks (which I have spent in Bournemouth rehearsing Okan). Akeim Toussaint and I have just begun creating the work on two amazing dancers: Ffion Campbell-Davies & David Evans for a premiere performance in Leeds in 2024 (with a few sharing opportunities for a magical few: find out where HERE).

Whilst working on Okan, I realised (and experienced the positive ripples), that on the ODI intensive, I had mostly only experienced JOY dancing… it may seem strange because as someone for whom dancing is my career, you might think that it would always be a joy… but as with any job (particularly those who are still working the old-school dance ways), there were many times when boundaries were crossed, and I learnt to push through, to do things I didn’t want to for the sake of the show (or worse), and closed my heart… and so, to be back in my HEART with dance was healing & emotional! 

To be reminded of my love of dance allowed for my heart to unfurl profoundly and deeply… and the end result was my falling back in love with my job (hooray!). That then created beautiful ripples in our studio time R&Ding Okan. Because I was back into this HEART state, I felt HOME in my body and comfortable to find my true YES (and No) with everything about how we worked… I was truly back in LOVE at work, and so I could show up even more creatively & playfully, and with deepening integrity, not coming from wounding or the past, but from my whole HEART. 

This has felt revolutionary to me, because whilst I have known for a long time that I wanted to undo some of the ways I have been expected to work in previous companies, I have internalised not looking after my own wellbeing: now I could see (and feel) how to and I created a wellbeing structure (with the support of Eva Martinez) which allowed me to put my wellbeing first. As a result I TRULY showed up in service to the work and the company and was in JOY around my dancers… this in turn created an even more alchemical process as we all are learning to create from a relaxed nervous system (HOMEostasis) instead of under the pressure of deadlines or out of fear to be ‘good enough’ (or many other survival motivated beliefs)…

We also held sharings and received feedback from many beautiful humans during our Okan rehearsal period this week, including (whom I was blessed to meet whilst painting the universe onto a cup: check out my instagram to learn more!) Dr Aanka Batta an amazing local Lecturer, Activist & Writer, whom suggested we consider how we might honour the history of the dances we are working with… check out my website HERE to read what we came up with so far… and your thoughts are always welcome on what we are missing 🥰

So it has felt like two weeks full of mini revolutions and huge changes within my inner & outer universe Ella! 

I feel so blessed and grateful to be unlearning the old school ways that led to my not being in my heart when I was creating. And I wish that for you too beautiful HEART!

How about you? 

How is your HEART? 

What are you creating? And what is bringing you JOY right now?

Sending Biggest Loves,

Ella “Maya Gandaia” Mesma xxx