A beautiful heart recently asked me if there is a difference between healing ourselves and revealing (they used a different word but revealing feels important and specific) our beliefs….
And I have been musing on this which led to my offering my thoughts (with their permission) as a newsletter…
So…
Here are my Maya musings…
In my experience… healing modalities can be powerful… but I also find that they can be never ending… I actually prefer the ones that don’t involve me having to relive traumatic past experiences (because… well the past can be painful… the past is in the past… and I only do such deep diving when it seems really obvious (intuitively) that it is time to dive into a past experience).
I love TRE (Trauma Release Exercise), which allows me to shake off the daily imprints of fight/flight/freeze/fawn, and HPC (Holistic Pelvic Care) for similar reasons… they don’t require looking into memories unless I explicitly choose to… but they do bring me balance and HOMEostasis…
And then if I know there is something deep un-surfacing, then I usually use a technique called Genius Realignment to go back into and unearth a memory and change the energy (the charge) it has on me… recently I have also tried (and found it effective) EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing)…
Then of course, there is my daily practice of choice making (explained in my Journal to JOY), where I reveal the JOY (My Vision), the Illusion (My current Reality & Beliefs) and then refocus my attention from my beliefs onto what I would love & how to take action towards that (The Bridge).
But what I am not into is the idea that I need fixing.
I don’t believe I was broken at any point: I was already whole & complete exactly as I was and am today… no matter what happened in my past or what I believe(d).
And likewise, my beliefs are not going to go away… they will still be there shouting and calling out for my attention, trying to point out why I should shrink my vision, or protect my heart or why my fear and longing to stay safe should override everything else…
The true art & magic in my experience, is in being able to see and name the belief, but hold onto the vision of what I would love without attempting to resolve the beliefs or the past.
So in that respect… I will also never be ‘fixed’… beliefs will come up, and come out and show up… as behaviors, as actions, as expressions or turns of phrase… for me the magic is in noticing what these are really about… observing, but not enacting them: not being affected by those thoughts and feelings… because very often they can mask what my heart would really love.
I often speak of grains of sand… for me, these are the moments when I spot a behavior that is motivated by a belief… for example a belief I am not good enough or don’t belong. These are thoughts I notice often (but I act out far less than when I first began this alchemical journey back in 2015 and as a result they now come up for me much less too)!
And when I do spot them, I use some of the techniques above… not to fix myself, but to understand what is really going on in my inner world…
I use the practices I mentioned above not to fix myself, not to heal, but to release the trapped energy in my body so I can come back HOME to myself and a state of HOMEostasis whereby I am not acting from trauma responses based on the past but from my HEART.
I use TRE, Journaling to JOY & HPC to get the emotions in motion… either to understand what a belief was about so it doesn’t have the same hold on my subconscious, or on a body level, to bring myself out of fight or flight to a state of balance & grounding (to come HOME to myself)… and then writing this musing led me to remembering a 10 day silence I went on in 2014, one of the earlier times I heard of Samskaras as sensations on the body. ‘Sam’ means to come together, and ‘kara’ means ‘the action under-taken’ or ‘what comes into being’. We could translate this to mean ‘the impression left behind from an intended action’. Are Samskaras then the beliefs? The past memories? Emotions held on the body? 🤔
Creating is for me the most powerful place to channel all of this energy: by sending all of those emotions it into what I would love instead of acting them out, I literally transmute that energy into creativity…
So learning to be ok with just being (not trying to resolve our identity) is so powerful: because then we can refocus all that energy from our past until now into what we would love… and be truly present (rather than trying to resolve our identity).
What are your thoughts on this Ella and do you have a regular set of tools in your Goddxx Box that you use to come HOME to yourself when your Root (or other chakras) are out of balance?
Biggest Loves,
Ella “Maya Gandaia” Mesma xxx